What Becoming A Mother Has Done To Me

As mum’s we have all questioned whether we good enough, whether we are doing the right thing, the best thing. The list is endless. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t question my ability as a mother. Normally it’s my husband who on the really bad days where I’m in tears tell’s me that I am a great mother because Logan is happy and healthy.

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Being pregnant I knew my life would change and it did change and mostly for the better. Does the lack of sleep suck? yes it does it really does (especially after last night….sleep what sleep?). All the way through my pregnancy with Logan people would tell me, you’ll never sleep the same again, you’ll never get a full night’s sleep even when they have grown up. My response was always something along the lines of well I’m a light sleeper anyway so it won’t make that much difference. I’ll tell you know I haven’t slept the same. Yes in the beginning when Logan was a new-born I thought I would never get to sleep ever again, but as Logan got older and started sleeping through the night I noticed my sleep had changed. At first I would still wake at 3 something am expecting Logan to wake up for a bottle but after a few nights something wonderful starting to happen. For the 1st time in a long time I was sleeping through the night. I’m talking dead to the world sleep. Of course this doesn’t do any good on the odd night Logan doesn’t go through. But on the whole I get a better night’s sleep than I ever did before. And it’s all down to the fact that I’m exhausted from looking after a toddler every day and now that I’m working part-time I’m even more exhausted and in a way it is such a nice feeling to have because I know at the end of the day when I get into bed it is pure bliss.

One of the things that I have learnt since becoming a mother is my naivety at how well I would do at losing the baby weight. Don’t get me wrong I have lost 2 stone since I had Logan but being over weight before being pregnant means I still have 3 stone to lose, and I have struggled (if you haven’t been following my Jelly Belly To Yummy Mummy posts take a read) I thought it would be easy that I’d be able to just work out 3-5 days a week and that it would be easy to fit in because I was at home with a baby. I was WRONG! I know there are some mum’s out there who has found it really easy to work out with a baby and lose their baby weight. But not me. I love food and I have no self-control or will power when it comes to naughty treats. This is something I am trying to work on.

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Having Logan is without a doubt the best thing I have ever done. Has it always been easy? No! Has it always been worth it? Absolutely! one thing that never entered my head was how much having a child would affect how I see myself or the affect it would have on my identity. Now having Logan hasn’t been the only thing that has had an effort on myself with regards to my identity or how I see myself but I definitely have neglected who I am. I have made Logan my world as he should be but I didn’t leave any room for myself.  I have lost all my sense of style (I’m not saying I had major style but I had my own look) but in the early days of C-Section recovery and breast-feeding I went for the comfies…..Jogging bottons and t-shirts and then it progressed to jeans and t-shirt and it has just kind of stayed there. I’ve become stuck in a rut and the thought of trying to be stylish makes me feel like an idiot, I’ll be honest.

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But I am slowly getting there as Logan is getting older I’m slowly finding myself find my feet with my new identity as a mum and as a person. This is just the tip of the ice burg for me as what becoming a mother has done to me. I love being a mum, it’s hard and it’s challenging and everyday is a learning curve, everyday I’m finding new things out about myself and about Logan. I knew this will never change until the day I die.

I love to know how becoming a mother changed you or what you learnt from it.

Please get in touch and leave a comment below. Or get in touch via Social media I will reply to everyone.

As always thank you for reading and until next time.

Sam

My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows

Other people's views

  1. The Speed Bump says:

    This is such a lovely post to read, it sounds like you are doing amazingly and Logan is a little cutie! It’s such a learning curve, isn’t it? I was fairly young when I got pregnant and had my daughter so I feel like I’ve learned to parent and learned to be an adult at the same time! Sounds like you’re doing great with the weight loss too, well done! #fartglitter

    1. Sam says:

      Thanks, Yeah it’s such a huge learning curve. I’ve been a Step-parent since for 4 years but known my step- daughter since she was just turning 3 and she’s now 9 so I feel a little prepared for when Logan gets to that age. lol
      THe weight loss has hit a wall to be honest I just can’t get out of this funk/rut I’ve got into. I was running regularly till I got shin splints and since then workouts etc have been hit and miss 🙁

  2. Mama, My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows says:

    This sounds very familiar. It’s a real adjustment to find your feet as a mum. Or at least it was for me. Sounds like you’re on the right track. Best of luck getting fit!
    Thanks for linking up to #fartglitter x

    1. Sam says:

      Thanks, yeah I’m only just starting to feel like my old self pre baby, felt like I had to be frumpy but I feel so paranoid about how I look with the remaining baby weight, I felt like there were expectations of how I should be and look being a new mum and some days I still feel like that. But I’m slowly getting there and slowly gaining more confidence.

  3. Helen Gandy says:

    It massively changed me, the way I think, the way I feel, my body! Gah! The list goes on!! Popping over from #fartglitter X

    1. Sam says:

      Yeah the biggest thing that is taking the most getting use to is the post baby body, still not happy want to lose all the weight just struggling with motivation at the moment and then that gets me dow so I eat such a catch 22 situation. But there have been good changes to. Like I feel like I’m a better person for having Logan.

  4. Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap) says:

    I think just the confidence thing was the biggest thing for me…I lost it and became more anxious. This is getting much better now and full night’s sleep always help! Keep at the fitness as you will do it and you look amazing in your made up pics 🙂 Bet it feels great to feel a bit more like you pre Logan xx #fartglitter

    1. Sam says:

      Oh god yes, I suffered with pani attacks and anxiety before Logan and the anxiety is definately worse now than it use to be. COnfidence has been an issue for me too, mainly with my body, I feel like I have lost all my confidence. I just feel so demotivated and stuck in a rut. I’m so tired in the mornings lately that I can’t get myself up early enough to work out and I don’t get home from work till nearly 9pm. Just need to find my balance and my motivation to just do it. So frustrating! I do feel better now I’m feeling bit like my old self…think going back to my dark hair and wearing make up more has helped and the job too.

  5. Mummy here and there says:

    It is amazing how navie we all can be but when reality hits it hits Dame hard. I was like you.minute the stone and pit kn a stone, oops! So your doing well and have direction. You will get there with the adjustments and when he gets more independent bot by bit it will change you again. Motherhood is a never ending learning experience X #fartingglitter

    1. Sam says:

      I was definately navie about how my weightloss would go, I just need to get focused and like you say as the boy gets older the easier it’ll be to fit in and maybe include him so that he grows up with a healthy lifestyle attitude.

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